Five years ago, we lost Gunnar—my nephew, my boys’ brother, and a light that brought humor, joy, and love to every moment. His smile, those dimples, and his wildly inappropriate jokes made him unforgettable. At just 22, his life ended too soon, and not a day goes by that we don’t feel his absence.
But Gunnar’s light didn’t go out—it sparked something in me. It reminded me how short life is and how grief, as painful as it is, can transform us. Honoring those we love is not just about remembering them, but about carrying their spark forward in everything we do.
Honoring My Sister and My Village
Gunnar was my sister’s only child, her world. I can’t begin to understand her pain, nor will I ever take lightly what it means to lose the life you imagined for yourself. Every step I’ve taken to honor Gunnar has been with her in my heart.
Through this, my village has carried me. My Aunt Sharon (Shazzy) reminds me daily that life is about reinvention—even at 80. My cousin Marilyn (Mimi) taught me to keep learning, growing, and living with purpose until her final days.
And there are the quiet forces—the hugs, the unconditional love, and the absence of judgment that allowed me to find my true self. These connections have been the foundation for this path to wellness.
Connection, Chaos, and Lola
My boys are my life, and everything I’m doing is bigger than me—it’s for them, too. They each have their own spark—music, humor, creativity—but it’s their bond as brothers that inspires me most. Despite their differences, their connection is unshakable, and it reminds me of the strength that comes from love and family.
This journey is about leading by example, showing them it’s okay to grow, embrace challenges, and keep moving forward. (And of course, Lola’s love helps keep us all grounded.)
Nature Heals, Humor Sustains
When life feels overwhelming, I turn to nature. The ocean, a sunset, or a quiet walk reminds me to pause, breathe, and reset.
And when nature isn’t an option, humor fills the gap. Misplacing my phone? Annoying, yes, but laughable. My boys’ jokes, the absurdity of life, and the chaos of daily living remind me that even when life is messy, there’s always light.
Practicing What I Preach
Gen Zen Wellness isn’t just about candles—it’s about creating space for connection, purpose, and finding your spark. And while I talk about pausing, breathing, and resetting, living it is an entirely different story.
Some days, I feel unstoppable. Other days, I realize I haven’t had a sip of water since morning and I’m running on fumes. But progress doesn’t have to be perfect—it just has to keep moving forward.
Keep Moving
As Gunnar’s anniversary approaches, I’m reminded that this isn’t about me. It’s about honoring his light, carrying his spark forward, and helping others find their own.
Life is short, unpredictable, and often wildly chaotic. But it’s also beautiful in its messiness. So here’s to pausing, breathing, resetting, and finding your light—even in the chaos.
